Keeping a Healthy Relationship as a Young Christian - 1

BEFORE YOU MARRY #38

KEEPING A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP AS A YOUNG CHRISTIAN

By Pastor William Boachie-Ansah

Texts: Psalm 37:3-4, Luke 14:28-30

"Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart."

"For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it --"lest, after he has laid the foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, 'This man began to build and was not able to finish.'" (NKJV)

Introduction

Knowing when and how to start a relationship is very crucial in the lives of every child of God. The next crucial decision of every believer after accepting Jesus as Lord and saviour is, the decision to choose a life partner. It therefore behoves on every Christian to watch and pray very well before approaching the ‘valley of decision’ in relationship matters. Take note that the basic axiom of lasting relationship is: Don’t start what you can’t finish. The essence of this axiom is firmly rooted in the admonition Jesus made about a building project. Just as builders plan well in order to finish well, whoever starts a relationship as a Christian must endeavour to sustain it, grow it in to marriage to bring more glory to Jesus.

What is relationship?

The Wordweb Dictionary defines relationship variously. But for our purpose, it refers to “the way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected.” “An emotional and sexual association between two people." The deception in this definition is that, in reality, the original meaning of relationship is about connections, not about sex. As soon as sex is involved, it becomes A TYPE OF MARRIAGE. We also hear you students have so many types of relationships. Any relationship which cannot sail you to the high seas of marriage should be abandoned as soon as possible.

“Keeping” brings into focus, the assumption that a relationship has already been started.I understood “healthy” to mean how “acceptable” the relationship should be, or the acceptable dos and don’ts expected to be kept by those in relationship as far as our Christian ethics is concerned.

So in this discussion, I may limit myself to those who have already started and want to keep it the right way. I hope to touch on the benefits and challenges associated with campus relationships and then offer practical ways to help keep such relationships. It must be expressly stated that, under no circumstances should a Christian start a marriage relationship with an unbeliever.

Benefits of keeping relationships

Keeping relations as a young person has a lot of advantages, but it has serious disadvantages too. But the most important thing to note is that relationship is for the spiritually and economically mature people, because relationship of the Christian must lead towards marriage. If you don’t think of marriage, don’t start a marriage relationship.

1. Opportunity to learn more about the opposite sex from a very close range. This is particular good for people without other siblings. A lady without brothers may not know much about guys. The same also applies to a guy who doesn't have sisters.

2. It helps to overcome the scarcity mentality. The sense of belonging it brings gives some high level of satisfaction. When you begin a relationship, your mind gets settled as to who you should choose. When others are being disturbed about who should become their future partners, those who start relationships earlier in life feel more comfortable.

3. Makes you think you’ve become more responsible so you become more diligent in the way you organize yourself. Generally, those young people in relationships pay attention to the way they organise themselves in order not to displease their partners. They pay particular attention to their appearance.

4. You get a good focus when you begin to pray about your future.

5. You get somebody to share your joys and disappointments with. Somebody you can confide in at a higher emotional expression level.

6. At times, you get good study and prayer partners out of relationships.

... To be continued..